And I lie lounging here… bubbling a vague sense of happiness <– (that sentence amuses me so I will allow its presence).
.. as my mind is conjuring a labyrinth answer *AHEM* the question I was going to propose: why does a sense of guilt skitter around after real happiness?
Not guilty pleasures here, (though I do spy a lonesome hunk of dark chocolate- sitting in plain sight – the nerve!)
I suppose it’s the wily old prowler trying to undo grace, shoving our unworthiness up our noses.
Yes, “I own I’m guilty, own I’m vile, yet Thy salvation’s free!” (respect to this page)
and a pretty picture to please your pupils:
Graying blue clouds blow across the sky and I inhale a steamy breath of rain, thunder and flickering light. And all I do is stand, grinning to God with rain splatting pearly wet on arms and lifted face. Grace like rain…and isn’t it the grace of God that rains on our parade to bring us in under the Tree of Life?
It has been said Christ’s suffering was for propitiation and our sufferings with Him the propagation. This suffering is deeply painful, and in this deep sorrow we feel how infinitely more must be this weight of Glory in the Father! We squirm with the package of suffering, but to receive it gratefully we gasp supreme Joy! And God’s faithfulness proves richest for us in the fire of suffering.
Jesus I am resting, resting In the joy of what Thou art; I am finding out the greatness Of Thy loving heart.
Thou hast bid me gaze upon Thee, And Thy beauty fills my soul, For by Thy transforming power, Thou hast made me whole.
(Jean Sophia Pigott)
Whom have I in heaven but You? And there is nothing on earth that I desire besides You. My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever! (Ps. 73:25-26)
No chance victims of time and circumstance, our lives are detailed by Sovereign God. I can rest assured His care is meticulous and love reminds each day.
He gives eternal life, His life!
He offers living water.
He invites us to rest.
And He gives us Himself.
God gives. And He gives generously! There are no half-hearted moments with God. He is not a begrudging miser unless you, like the foolish man, take no care in investing for God.
God gives so we can continually empty. We empty our cups to fill our brother’s and we have no fear of waste; God delights in us spilling over!
I want to be overwhelmed in Your Love, JESUS. How do I be love(d) today?
Show me the passion, the emotion, the fervency and devotion.
Don’t polish and prim dull LOVE!
Don’t refine it, define it, outline it.
Don’t make it sensible.
I want to see the fire.
That fire in Your eyes.
The fire of of Your Holiness.
Blazoned and searing.
You alive. Ecstatic.
Don’t leave it quiet, pithy.
Why was Your passion death? And the glory.. to die for?
Let me be ever consumed in adoration, as Your burning ones.
Flickering seems safe, steady.
Where does racing and consuming meet still small and growing?
Race with patience, fervent heart.
GOD is my Provider and He is my Provision.
And if GOD is my portion, as witness to His care; I am full!
For all things are for your sakes that the abundant grace might through the thanksgiving of many redound to the glory of GOD (2 Corinthians 4:15).
GOD provides in this Bread I break.
For flesh to be broken is for GOD to be shared.
This Provision is so I can gape. Mouth, Heart, Eyes Wide! I am open for MORE!
You declare for Yourself. Yes, yes, You Are GOD! You need nothing. You Are all glory, all holy. For me to see, to know. How do I know?
With beholding more and more, finite skimming the endless. Our endless desires. His endless gifts. Our endless demands. His endless faithfulness. We are so parched. HE IS SO FULL. JoyFull!
And “Thank You, Lord,” because this is Life, new, again. We are made new, but everyday is to do it again. Again, dear Jesus, show me again, who is GOD?